Whole30

Let's face it. Society places a huge emphasis on weight and physical appearance. Think about how many diet plans are out there. There’s the Paleo diet, the Mediterranean diet, the grapefruit diet. Popular in LA are the juice cleanses and detoxes. There’s Weight Watchers, Hydroxycut, and let’s not forget whole30challenge. 

The millions of diets, clean-eating plans, and fitness programs and technology, and surgery all promise one thing: confidence in yourself and love for your body. Not a bad goal…it’s actually a huge goal in my recovery. But where we differ is in the means to the happy healthy you. The diet mentality says the only way to be comfortable in your skin in to lose weight. And by losing weight, the diet “promises” you self-confidence, self-worth, and meaning in life.

This. Is. A. Lie.

Believe me, for years I completely ate it up. I believed if I lost “x” more pounds I would love my body. I aimed to change my body in hopes of finding my place in the world. I ate ‘clean’ to get rid of the disgust and shame I held. But at the end of each day, I was left without any self-worth and zero confidence in my skin. As I lost more and more weight, I began losing who I was. I lost my fiery spirit. I lost my spunk. I lost my will to live.

In direct contrast to everything I’ve heard in the world, I’ve discovered more happiness as I gained weight. Because as I gained weight, I gained myself back. I have opinions again. I have passions that spur a desire to make a difference in the world. I can be silly and not care what people think. I’ve gained back laughter—the kind where you can’t breathe and your stomach hurts so bad!

All of that I did by expanding what I ate…not restricting it. Through eating, I am discovering that confidence doesn’t come from the scale or my physical body at all. It comes from embracing my true spirit. I am reconnecting and maybe knowing for the first time that my self-worth is found in God’s love for me and the incredible human he has created me to be. I am learning that my past mistakes and even future ones do not change that.

A month ago my dietitian challenged me to a different kind of whole30. 30 days of eating 100% of my meal plan. It’s a huge accomplishment that I did it and that am continuing on that path. (Go me!) What I have discovered is that sticking to the plan gives me freedom to find my value in things other than my body.

So I leave you with a similar challenge. For 30 days, fight the diet mentality. However this looks for you, whether its by eating what you want, exercising when it feels good, complimenting your kids on things other than their appearance, directly speaking up for body acceptance, or quietly embracing your body, stick to it for 30 days. It’s my bet that at the end of the 30 days, you’ll keep it going just like I have.